A list of (un)intelligent things sam reilly & myself
Have done in the duration of 48 hours.
call up 17 taxis for names such as "beebra sheila noonga"
"Geraldine nipp"
"Jenny lozenger"
"Ben Dover "
"barbeldine"
"tits mcgovin"
Etc. And watch them all line up one after the other.
Walk into the middle of a west-end party
And demand bags of crack cocaine or "shits about to hit the fan"
Wait outside of clubs and hassle people for cigarettes.
Pretending to give birth on a train, I was playing the doctor.
Then proceeding to laugh at the bogan who comes up to tell us that if we don't " settle da fuck down" we will wake up tommorow morning with "no fuckin nose bone and a knee to the throat" pure class.
Proceeding to then tell this bogan that it's no surprise she's getting off at beenleigh, & that she's a perfect example of why abortion is a blessing that her parents, unfortunatley, could not afford.
Running away from a very angry bogan Sheila.
Sam stepping on my foot in his macbeths and ripping my toenail off. How divine.
Finding a baby sock on the escalators and crying out for " young Timmy tucker!" the baby who's mother turned her back for just a second. Aha.
Jumping on attractive males who stroll out of thriller at 1am.
Doing a native tribal dance infront of the showgirls as a sign of "respect"
Then trying to get into showgirls, running past the security gaurd and to the staircase screaming "I JUST WANT TO SEE TITS & MOOT!"
Giving two straightedge guys with long hair a talk about how I think magda subanski would do a much better job at governing Australia than gillard. They agreed.
Meeting kev. He was wearing a lively flannlette jacket.
Meeting Stefan and trying to convince him that our parents owned david jones. Sam says it was the only way he would respect us. I laughed.
Speaking fluent French to tourists. Japanese tourists.
Catching a cab, telling the driver to crank up music as we stick our heads out the window and yell obscenities at girls who wear their undergarments as dresses.
Go back to sams house and drink champagne and eat fetta shapes. Get even more pissed, and prank call my whole phonebook. Sorry..
Pass out, wake up in the morning and have a daab.
Sam thought it would be a nice idea to show me his pet snake whilst I was on the phone. I jumped out the back window and fell off the balcony.
Seeing the small kids on the swing next door and playing suicide silence full bull. Hhahaahhahahahahhaha. It was like a lyrical nightmare for those smalll darlings Ahahah.
Going out in our underwear with the whip and learning how to crack it. Not a good idea. Sam pretending to be Indiana jones whilst walking around half naked. It was absolutley hilarious.
Throwing apples at small children.
All of these things have been done under the influence of alcaholic beverages. It's great.
me
grafiti
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